All the Small Moments
by BJXCBFOREVER
Summary: Drabbles about Human!Perry. Various pairings including our favourite agent.
1. Drabbles: All

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry and Agent M (Molly the Mouse).**

**Pairings include: Human!PerryxVanessa, Parental!MonogramxHuman!Perry, Frenemy!HeinzxHuman!Perry, Brotherly!FerbxHuman!PerryxPhineas, Parental!LindaxHuman!Perry, One-sided!MollyxHuman!Perry.**

**If any of these pairings make your skin crawl, hit the back button. **

…

**1. Job -**

Perry tied his tie, staring in the mirror. He picked up the comb and sent it through his teal hair, brushing out the knots. Turning to the closet, he pulled out his blazer and slipped it on. As he turned to leave the bedroom, the floor opened beneath him and he fell through, landing in his lair. The screen flashed on and his boss' face came on the screen. "Morning, Agent P."

Perry's fedora fell down on top of his head. "Morning, sir."

"On with your mission…"

Later…

"Seriously, Perry the Platypus!" Doofenshmirtz exclaimed as Perry tied him up. "Why'd ya always have to go for the nose?" He asked, looking at his bruised nose.

"It's my job, Heinz." Perry simply replied, then waited for this so-called 'backup' to arrive.

**2. Kiss -**

Perry had been kissed by Vanessa quite a few times. She'd kissed him on the lips, the cheek, the forehead. Though there was one kiss, other then their first one, that he'd always remember.

He was still a platypus at the time. During one of his battles with Doofenshmirtz, the inator (which's name escapes him) had knocked Vanessa off of the balcony. Doofenshmirtz had cried out for her and Perry had jumped off, attaching his jetpack to his back and quickly catching her before she could fall. Under her request, he had not taken her back to her father's. He'd set her down on the sidewalk. Vanessa had smiled and gently kissed his cheek. Perry had paused, his eyes widening. Then he smiled back and tipped his hat. With that, the platypus had flown off, hearing Vanessa's call of: "Thank you, Perry the Platypus!"

**3. Phones -**

After overhearing several of Perry's phone calls, which usually end in "Yes, of course we can meet up there. See you then. Bye.", Vanessa began to get suspicious. While he was talking to Major Monogram, Vanessa had found his phone. She opened it and paused.

The picture he used for his screen's wallpaper was that of a little, triangle-headed boy, who she recognized as Phineas. He was wearing Perry's blazer, his arms up in the air. Phineas' hands only made it to the places where Perry's elbows should've been. Vanessa had swallowed the lump in her throat and checked his recent calls list. Again, she paused at what she saw:

_Phineas, Phineas, Ferb, Ferb, Phineas, Vanessa, Ferb, Phineas._

Oh. Maybe he wasn't cheating after all.

"Did you want to call Phineas and Ferb?"

Vanessa jumped and turned, only to see Perry staring at her confusedly.

**4. Father -**

Perry couldn't remember having a real, platypus father. He couldn't remember much from his early childhood. Although, he could remember Major Monogram teaching him how to walk. He remembered the major reading him stories at bedtime. And he remembered that he never slept in his bed, only at the end of the major's.

Perry didn't need a platypus father.

Perry had Major Monogram.

**5. Music-**

Perry tried so hard to like Vanessa's music, really he did. But the way the heavy metal burst into his ears when he put on her earphones was just so terrible, he couldn't help but wrench them away from him.

"Perry," Vanessa said. "You know, you _can _take those out right?"

"No, no," Perry said. "I can take it." And another song burst into his ears, and the agent jumped a feet in the air.

**6. Love-**

"Why is love so difficult, major?" Perry asked after his argument with Vanessa, and Monogram wrapped an arm around the upset agent.

Feeling pity for the teenager, Monogram proceeded to tell him stories about he and Mrs. Monogram and how difficult their relationship was, but now they were married.

Perry fell asleep after the last story was finished.

**7. Razor-**

"Geez, Perry the Platypus!" Doofenshmirtz exclaimed. "Don't you know anything about hygiene?"

Perry stared, then ran a hand over the teal stubble; which decorated his chin and jaw line. "I don't know how to shave…Major said he'd teach me."

Heinz huffed. "C'mon."

The next time anyone saw Perry, he had small cuts on his jaw line. "What happened, Perry?" Phineas asked.

"I allowed Heinz to teach me to shave…"

"Who's Heinz?"

"Don't worry…"

**8. Dance-**

When the Winter Dance came around, Vanessa couldn't help but worry about her popularity. How bad would she look, going to a dance on her own? She and Johnny had broken up ages ago, and it would look pathetic if she went crawling back to him. Putting on a brave, 'I-don't-care-what-you-think' façade, Vanessa, dressed in a long black and purple gown with long black gloves, went to the dance. It was supposed to be this silly masquerade thing. The teachers thought it'd be cool if everyone wore masks. Vanessa didn't agree, but came wearing a butterfly mask anyway.

Whilst sitting at a table on her own, glass of punch in front of her, someone walked over to her table. He wore a dashing black suit and, much to her surprise, a cape; long and flowing down to his ankles. He wore a large hat with a white feather and a black mask with a flat piece with a sharp end, dragging down his nose and finishing at the tip. She couldn't see their eyes, the mask was too dark, and their hair was covered by the hat. He'd asked her to dance in an Australian accent and she'd agreed, thinking it was better then sitting on her own. He had spun her into a waltz to the slow music and Vanessa tried to find out who this was. The voice was familiar, the dance moves were familiar, but she couldn't quite think who this was. Somewhere during the dancing, the couples around them had stopped to watch the odd-looking couple.

When the man dipped her, she finally saw his eyes; chocolate brown eyes. "…Perry?"

"Yes. Yes, it is." Perry replied, smiling. "I thought you'd figure it out, you clever girl."

"But…"

"But what?"

"What's with the Australian accent?"

"Well," Perry said. "I'm originally from Australia, that's what the Major said." Changing back to his usual American accent, Perry continued. "I just spend too much time around you Americans."

Vanessa smiled and they continued their dance.

**9. Children-**

Linda had a lot of experience with children. She had three of her own, she babysat for her friends, Phineas and Ferb's friends would come around often, so the house was usually full of kids. Which is why, she supposed, she immediately took a motherly instinct when Perry came around. He was older then Candace, taller too. But she saw the way he treated their home, cleaned up if he made a mess; apologizing repeatedly as though Linda was about to whip him for it. He kept Phineas and Ferb busy, playing with them and spending time with them. He never just took food, he always asked first. He even asked to take water from the tap, for goodness sake. He must have really well-mannered parents, Linda thought, if he was like this in other peoples' presence.

"Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher…?"

Linda turned, only to see Perry standing in the doorway. He held a white and blue striped bowl in both hand, his spoon poking out of the dish. He tipped it slightly, to show the little marks of oatmeal, but otherwise empty bowl. "May I have some more oatmeal, please…?" The innocence of the question made her heart swell, especially seeing how big his eyes had gotten.

Linda smiled and took the bowl from him. "Of course you can, Perry."

Perry smiled. "Thank you, Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher."

Linda turned to fill up his bowl. Perry was just one big child, needing to be loved and cared for.

**10. Unrequited-**

Molly was forced to be the Flynn-Fletcher family's new pet. They didn't know this, of course. She was operating the Perry-the-Platypus robot, created by the O.W.C.A. The real Perry was now human; a tall, handsome young man with the new ability to talk and properly interact with humans. He had a easier time defeating Doofenshmirtz (not that he had any trouble before, it was just a little difficult fighting someone who was, like, three times your height) and got to spend time with his old owners, now considered his 'second family' (Monogram and the others at the O.W.C.A being his first and the Doofenshmirtzs being his third). But she and Perry rarely talked nowadays. Only when Phineas was getting Perry to pet 'Perry', Perry would whisper a hello to his mouse friend. Molly grew envious of people, especially Vanessa, who held Agent P's heart. She knew her love was unrequited, even when Perry was still a platypus.

Oh, well. At least she could be Perry's friend.

…

Author's note:

Random bits and bobs I thought of the other day about Human!Perry. I'll do more later, and of course you can request a word for Human!Perry.

I'm half tempted to write a complete one-shot about the Dance one…

To people who have requested one-shots, I promise I'll get to them. Pinky swear.


	2. Drabbles: Perry & Monogram

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry and Agent M (Molly the Mouse).**

**These drabbles will mostly be about Parental!MonogramxHuman!Perry, but will also contain the couples previously mentioned. **

**The back button is still available.**

…

**1. Name (suggested by CoronaIgnis)-**

As Buford and Baljeet entered the backyard, Buford carrying Baljeet like luggage, they immediately paused when they noticed the teal-haired teenager. "Phineas, who is this man?" Baljeet asked.

"Oh," Phineas began, putting down his wrench. "This is our friend, Perry Platy-"

"Monogram."

Phineas paused, then looked up at Perry. "Monogram?"

"Yes."

"You said your name was Platypus."

"…That's my middle name."

"Your name is Perry Platypus Monogram?"

"…Yes?" Perry looked over at 'Perry'. "Yes, my name is Monogram." He winked afterwards. Molly, inside the Perry robot, smiled and pressed a few buttons.

At the agency, Monogram clicked on a new e-mail. "Agent M?" As he opened it, a video came up.

"_You said your name was Platypus."_

"…_That's my middle name."_

"_Your name is Perry Platypus Monogram?"_

"…_Yes?" Perry looked over at the screen "Yes, my name is Monogram." He winked afterwards._

Monogram smiled, tearing up.

**2. Father's Day-**

"Father's Day?" Perry had asked, seeing Phineas, Candace and Ferb give a gift to their father. "What's that?"

"You don't know what Father's Day is?" Candace asked. "Geez, where've you been?"

"…Australia?"

"It's where you give gifts to your dad to let him know you appreciate him." Phineas explained.

Perry stared. "Haven't you ever given a gift to _your dad, _Perry?" Phineas asked.

Perry blinked. He had almost admitted to not having a father, but stopped himself.

He did.

Later, when Monogram entered his office, there was a small box on his desk. Wrapped up in blue wrapping paper and a red bow, the box sat in the middle of his desk, between his paper work and his stapler. Monogram approached it slowly, wary of it, then carefully took hold of the bow, pulling it undone. As the box opened, Monogram's brow scrunched up in confusion. Then he noticed the piece of paper on the bow and lifted it, reading it.

_Dear Major Monogram,_

_Happy Father's Day,_

_P_

Finally, he understood who had given him the gift and smiled.

The next day, when giving Perry his mission, the agent had smiled when he saw the platypus pin proudly stuck on his boss' shirt.

**3. Bonding-**

Monogram and Perry didn't play catch. They didn't go to football games. They didn't go fishing. They didn't do normal, father-son bonding stuff.

For them, Perry rescuing Monogram from Dr. Doofenshmirtz and then chasing the scientist through the sky on Perry's hovercraft _was bonding. _

**4. Talk-**

There was a knock on the door and Monogram looked up as Perry poked his head into the room. "Agent P?"

"Sorry to bother you, sir." Perry apologized. "I just…I just have to ask you a question, sir."

Monogram leaned back in his chair, putting down his pen, and smiling at the agent. "Fire away, Agent P."

"Well…Do humans lay eggs?"

Monogram froze. "What?"

"Do they lay eggs?"

"…No."

"So…Where do human babies come from?"

Monogram's eyes widened and Carl hid his sniggers behind one hand.

**5. Rain (requested by igbogal)-**

Monogram had made his decision final.

After Perry had tried to catch Doofenshmirtz while it was raining, the water had gotten into Perry's eyes, blinding him and making him fly through a flock of ravens; which pecked at him as he passed through them. Blinded by rain water and wounds, Perry crashed into a building. Luckily, the agent had survived the plummet to the ground (and, surprisingly, it had been Doofenshmirtz who called an ambulance) and only had to suffer a broken arm and a light concussion. However, Monogram had said Perry was not to fly through rain again. "But, sir-" Perry had protested.

"No, Perry," Monogram exclaimed and Perry shrank back. Monogram rarely called him by his name. "My decision is final."

Because Monogram wasn't willing to see his agent get injured again. He wasn't willing to have to sit in the hospital and wait for Agent P to wake up. He definitely wasn't willing to hear another story from Heinz about Perry's 'accident', both men overcome with regret and guilt.

But, most of all, he just couldn't see Perry in the hospital again.

**6. Potential-**

Monogram hoped Agent P wasn't too mad about changing him into a human.

Perry had panicked about it at first, asking how Monogram could do that to him. The truth was, Monogram had picked Perry to test the ray because he knew Perry had potential. He knew he could overcome anything.

And he did.

**7. Duty-**

Monogram's heart broke as he watched Perry take Vanessa's hand and walk into the gym with her, into prom. Perry had been dating Vanessa for ages now, longer then Monogram cared to remember. He didn't hate Vanessa, but he didn't exactly enjoy her presence either. Not since she began dating his so- agent. If she broke Perry's heart, Monogram would find some of his finest agents to, uh, 'teach her a lesson'.

But Monogram had done his duty. He'd taught Perry how to walk, how to answer questions through sign language, how to read and write. Now Perry was growing up, and Monogram just had to deal with it.

Suddenly, Perry burst out of the gym's doors and Monogram stopped thinking. What had happened? Had Vanessa hurt him? Monogram's hand tightened around the key, which was just about ready to turn and start the car. Perry waved to him from he stood, a wide smile on his face. "Thanks, Major!"

Monogram smiled. Same old Perry.

**8. Communicate-**

Monogram understood why Perry was so confused. Before, Perry communicated through facial expressions and hand gestures. But to actually _talk _to people had grown to be a challenge. Especially when he got tongue-twisted around Vanessa Doofenshmirtz.

So, Monogram had only been a little surprised when Perry asked him how to talk to girls you were attracted to.

**9. Enemies-**

Sometimes, Monogram wasn't childish. Sometimes he knew responsibility. Everyone was surprised when Agent P began a fight with another agent- not just verbally either. An actual physical fight. The agent in question had blown a raspberry at Perry, and Perry had snapped. Monogram grabbed Perry by the waist and pulled him away, sitting him down and giving him a stern scolding. Perry had hung his head in shame like a child.

Perry should've known not to act that way- even if it _was _Peter the Panda.

**10. Dad-**

All dads were different, Perry observed.

Lawrence was nerdy, yet kind and gentle with his son and step children.

Heinz was evil (or, at least, tried to be), but he would never, ever hurt his daughter.

Rodney was…well, he didn't quite know what kind of dad Rodney was, but he was sure he was different then Lawrence and Heinz.

Monogram…Monogram was childish, but he'd never hurt one of his agents, especially not Agent P, and though he was irresponsible at times and serious at others, he still the best boss Perry could ask for.

And the best dad.

…

Author's note:

Of course you can request a word (or phrase, if you want) for Human!Perry.

This set of drabbles focus on two of my favourite characters and (probably) my favourite relationship involving a Human!Perry.

Perry probably does know where kids come from, but I thought it'd be funny if he was oblivious to where humans come from and went to Monogram for the answer. After all, how embarrassing would it be if he asked Heinz or Vanessa? My guess, pretty embarrassing.

I hope you like **Rain, **igbogal. I bet you were expecting something fluffy, instead you got…Perry getting injured. *Chuckles nervously* It was the first thing I thought of…


	3. Drabbles: Perry & Doofenshmirtz

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry and Agent M (Molly the Mouse). **

**These drabbles will mainly be about Frenemy!HeinzxHuman!Perry, but will contain the couples previously mentioned. **

**The back button costs a little bit of exercise in the hand, nothing more.**

…

**1. Height-**

Everything was so much simpler when Perry was a platypus. He'd been so much smaller then Heinz, the scientist just had to stick out his foot to hold Perry back. Now, he was a tall young man with teal-hair and the ability to kick Heinz's adult butt.

Still, at least he was still Perry.

**2. Human-**

Heinz didn't _forget _that Perry was a human. Of _course _he didn't. He wasn't _that _much of an idiot. He just didn't want to accept it.

Perry had always been a platypus, ever since they first met. That teal-coloured fur had become the teenager's hair. The eyes were still there, of course, and Heinz wouldn't have them any other way.

So, whenever Perry let out his platypus chatter, Heinz had to hide his smile. He was still Perry the Platypus on the inside; his nemesis, his frenemy and the one always responsible for the bruises on Heinz's arms and face.

**3. Machine-**

Heinz had created a lot of machines over the years, ones that, he had hoped, would ensure his take-over of the Tri-State Area. He loved machines. They were his hobby, his habit, what he did for a living.

But he had felt nothing but horror when he saw Platyborg. He felt disgusted. Goodness…

How could he do that to Perry?

**4. Looks-**

To this day, Perry still mentally kicked himself for being so foolish.

He couldn't do it. It was the eyes that done it. He couldn't go to the Alternate Doofenshmirtz and punch him 'round the face like he'd wanted.

He looked too much like his Heinz Doofenshmirtz.

**5. Starfish-**

Perry and Doofenshmirtz are fighting in a boat. Doofenshmirtz knocks Perry into the water and laughs triumphantly. Perry emerges from the water and throws something at Doofenshmirtz's face, making his world go black. He's not unconscious, he knows that, and tries to pull the thing off of his face. Eventually, Perry is forced to help.

"Seriously, Perry the Platypus!" Doofenshmirtz exclaims, his words slightly muffled as the starfish holds on tightly. "Just because you're semi-aquatic, doesn't mean you can use your 'fish friends' to help you!"

Perry frowns and can't be bothered to remind Doofenshmirtz that he's not a platypus anymore, therefore he's not really semi-aquatic.

**6. Feeling (related to 'Rain')-**

Doofenshmirtz had actually _panicked _when he saw Perry plummet to the ground.

The panic had clouded his thoughts of evil and he had called an ambulance. A part of him was actually _glad _that Perry had gotten hurt- and he cursed that part. This was serious. This wasn't like the time Perry had fallen into the Sandpaper Factory.

He was in the hospital, in the 'relatives room', when Major Monogram and Carl burst in. Monogram immediately went to the receptionist, who told him what room Perry was in, and Monogram had vanished down the corridor. Carl had sat opposite Heinz in the little side room. The scientist knew that the intern kept glancing at him, accusing glances that made his stomach twist. Doofenshmirtz got up and went into Perry's room.

There the agent was, laying in bed, unconscious. Major Monogram sat on a chair beside his bed, staring intently as though the teenager was about to awaken. Dr. Doofenshmirtz cleared his throat uncomfortably. He hadn't done this much, so it felt weird as he said, "I'm sorry about Perry the Platypus."

He said it because he meant it. He knew how much Perry meant to Major Monogram and how heartbreaking it must be to see his so- _agent _like this. Heinz had worried so much when Vanessa had broken her arm. Admittedly, that wasn't as bad as Perry's injuries, but he still knew the feeling of worry.

Quietly, Doofenshmirtz held out the object he'd been holding since the accident. Monogram looked up, took Perry's fedora from Heinz and muttered a tearful "Thanks", then placed it on the bedside table for Perry to wear once he awoke.

**7. Fire (requested by Xire)-**

Despite the fact that they were a deep blue, there was a fire in Doofenshmirtz's eyes that Perry recognized as determination.

Every time Perry arrived in Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc., he would see the same fire in Doofenshmirtz's eyes. They both knew who was going to win these fights, but that didn't stop the determination from filling Doofenshmirtz's eyes. They were a way of telling Perry that Heinz would not give up, no matter what.

Perry would leave as a new fire started, the one caused by the destroyed inator. The fire in Doofenshmirtz's eyes would dim.

But it was back again the next day.

**8. Attendance-**

Perry was nearly always on time to everything.

Meetings with Major Monogram, projects with Phineas and Ferb, dates with Vanessa and daily battles with Doofenshmirtz. If Perry was late to even one of these things, the waiting person/people would become worried. Perry was good with attendance.

Heinz didn't like to admit it, but even he felt a _little _worried when Perry was late to a battle, but his impatience would cover his worry and he would scold Perry for being late.

**9. Parent-**

Perry understood why Doofenshmirtz was worried about him dating Vanessa.

Heinz was a father. It was practically his _duty _to be protective and worry about his daughter. Perry wasn't oblivious to the glares Doofenshmirtz would send him whenever Perry and Vanessa were together. Doofenshmirtz was just worried and Perry could accept that.

After all, how many evil scientist's daughters got to date their father's nemesis?

**10. Awkward-**

"So…you swapped bodies with a teenage girl? That _wasn't _a disguise?"

"No. No, it wasn't."

Doofenshmirtz pauses, looks away, then looks back to Perry. "That must've been… como se dice?... Awkward…"

"Yes. Yes, it was."

"Must've been…weird being in a girl's body."

"It was, yes."

"But you must've had some sort of…feeling."

"Hm? I'm not following."

"Well…you're a _teenager, _Perry the Platypus-"

"Human."

"-_and _you're a _guy!_ Must've felt something."

"…The awkwardness of this conversation has just increased tenfold. Thank you, Heinz."

"Don't be all sarcastic with me, Perry the Platypus-"

"Human."

"-_I'm _the one who didn't _hatch _from an _egg._"

"Pardon me for being born."

There's silence before Heinz speaks again. "So, how did it feel?"

"I'm leaving now."

"Aw, _c'mon, _Perry the Platypus! It's not like you can go to Monobrow about this sort of thing! Perry the Platypus, you come back and sit down this instant!"

The door slams as Perry leaves the apartment.

In his impatience and anger, Heinz shouts, "Curse you, Perry the Platypus!"

…

Author's note:

Of course you can request a word (or phrase, if you want) for Human!Perry.

I admit, I had trouble with this one.

I had to use a word generator for a couple of them, just because I was stuck for words. That's where the Starfish one came from.

I hope you like **Fire, **Xire. I was originally gonna write Perry saving Doof from Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. while it was burning (because that building burns _a lot), _but then I thought about the term 'Fire in your eyes' and thought of Doof. ;)

The last one is obviously about the episode Does This Duckbill Make Me Look Fat? I've always thought it'd be weird for Perry to be in Candace's body. He must've felt quite…awkward. Same for Candace. But Doof is just teasing Perry in the last one…mostly. Otherwise, he's just having a nice conversation with his nemesis.

Can't you just imagine Perry going to Monogram about that sort of thing? XD


	4. Drabbles: Perry & Phineas & Ferb

**All the Small Moments**

**I do not own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry and Agent M (Molly the Mouse).**

**These drabbles will mainly be about Brotherly!FerbxHuman!PerryxPhineas, but will contain the other pairings previously mentioned, as well as some Ferbella (FerbxIsabella).**

**The back button: it's in the corner of the screen!**

…

**1. Expertise-**

Perry didn't need to help Phineas with ideas for projects. He'd hint at one thing and Phineas would come up with a completely different idea. But that was ok.

Perry and Phineas were both good at their own things. Perry was good at sneaking around, Phineas was good with his imagination, Perry was good at martial arts, Phineas was good with drawing blueprints. Sometimes, they tried each other's fortes. Phineas would try sneaking around, while Perry would try to draw blueprints.

Now, as Perry sits at the Flynn-Fletcher kitchen table, trying to draw an invention on the blue paper, he looks up; seeing the little clump of red hair poking out from the other side of the table. "I can see you, Phineas."

Phineas stands on his tip toes so that he can see Perry. "Aw. How'd you know?"

Perry points to his own head and Phineas runs a hand through his red hair. He scampers back outside, exclaiming, "I'll just have to try harder!"

Perry chuckles. Phineas has been trying to scare him all day. Of course, Phineas doesn't know that Perry is a highly-trained secret agent, who knows to expect the unexpected.

**2. Right (Based off of one of Perry's lines in 'Band of Brothers')-**

Ferb sits in his armchair, newspaper open in his lap. He is an adult now, tall and handsome. Isabella is in the kitchen, cooking their dinner for the evening. Ferb keeps insisting she shouldn't, what with the baby on the way, but she doesn't listen.

"Daddy! Daddy!"

Ferb's children run over to him, his daughter clambering up onto his lap while his son smiles at Ferb. Ferb hugs his daughter with one arm and ruffles his son's dark hair with his free hand. Isabella watches from the doorway, smiling; a hand rested on the tiny baby bump.

Ferb smiles. "Gee, Perry was right."

**3. Suits-**

When Ferb's birthday come around, Perry knows exactly what he's going to get him. He gets the OWCA's best tailors on the job.

When it comes to handing out presents, Perry hands Ferb a rectangular box. As Ferb lifts the lid, both he and Phineas peek inside the box. Ferb's face lights up, but Phineas looks disappointed. Perry pokes both their shoulders and gestures for them to follow.

Later, Linda, Lawrence and Candace are seated on the sofa; the redheaded teenager wondering aloud what was going on. Then, they hear, "_Introducing…!"_

Perry jumps into the room, dressed in his normal platypus suit. "Perry!"

Ferb jumps out, on Perry's left. He is dressed in a miniature version of Perry's suit. "Ferb!"

Phineas jumps out, on Perry's right. He is dressed in an even smaller- yet perfectly sized- version of the platypus-turned-human's suit. "Phineas!"

Linda lets out a loud, "Aww!" and quickly snaps pictures of her sons and their friend.

Later, Perry puts the photo of he, Ferb and Phineas- all dressed the same- on his bedside table. He smiles.

**4. Moving On-**

Perry was worried when he had explain to Ferb that Vanessa was too old for the green-haired boy. He was worried that Ferb would get jealous and snap at Perry.

He was a fool to think so.

Perry finished his phone call with Vanessa, knowing that Ferb had just walked passed him; hearing his friend talk to his crush. Ferb turned back and walked over. He stopped in front of Perry and Perry looked down; expecting Ferb to be scowling at him. Instead, Ferb was picking a white daisy out of the ground. He walked over to Isabella, tapped her shoulder and handed the flower to her; getting a "Thanks, Ferb" in return.

Perry smiled, glad that Ferb was moving on.

**5. Hat-**

Perry panics when his fedora goes missing. Major Monogram would kill him if he found out he'd lost it. Perry looks everywhere: in his lair, at OWCA headquarters. He even checks Doofenshmirtz's apartment!

"Hey, Perry,"

"Not now, Phineas." Perry says quickly, checking in a drawer.

"But, Perry-"

"Where is it? Where is it?"

"Perry,"

"What?"

"Why do you have a fedora in your coat?"

Perry turns and sees his beloved hat in Phineas' hands. He swipes it from him. "…In case of emergencies…"

"What emergencies?"

Perry pauses. "…Hat emergencies."

**6. Brothers-**

Perry had wondered what Phineas and Ferb would be to him when he became human.

He hoped they'd, at least, be his friends. Acquaintances, he could put with. Enemies, heck no.

He just had no idea they'd be his brothers.

**7. Greeting-**

Perry hadn't expected it at first.

Then it had become normal.

Every time, Perry rang the doorbell of the Flynn-Fletcher household, it would either be Candace or Linda who opened the door. They would call that Perry was here (or, well, Candace would call, "Phineas! Ferb! Your weird platypus friend is here!") and he'd suddenly hear, "Perry!"

Phineas would come running down to the front door and greet Perry with a large smile, Ferb not far behind his brother.

These greetings were normal, but they never got old.

**8. Chatter-**

"Ok, I'll show you _one more time._" Perry said. His eyes became unfocused and he let out his platypus chatter. His eyes refocused and he stared at the two boys.

Phineas was first. His eyes became unfocused and he let out a rather raspy version of Perry's chatter.

Ferb was next. His eyes became unfocused as well and he let out a very fast version of Perry's chatter.

Both were not quite right, though Perry admired their determination to learn.

**9. Battle-**

"Ok, Perry. It's you and me vs. Ferb and Isabella. Are you ready?"

"Ready, Phin."

Ferb and Isabella launch and throw their weapons. Phineas gasps and duck. Unfortunately, Perry is not so lucky and is hit in the chest. He lays on the floor, hand over his wound. Phineas gasps and kneels beside him. "Perry!"

"Phineas…Go on without me…" Perry says weakly. He closes his eyes and lays his head back, tongue hanging out of his mouth.

Phineas throws his head back. "NOO!"

"Phineas! Ferb! Come inside!" Linda calls.

Phineas saddens. "Aw…Rats. Ok, Perry, you can get up."

Perry sits up, snow stuck to his back. "We'll just have to pick up this re-enactment of the movie we saw last night later, I guess." Phineas says glumly.

**10. Catchphrase-**

The day would start with, "Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!"

And end with, "Oh, there you are, Perry!"

Perry takes great pleasure in hearing these catchphrases. He is sitting underneath the tree with Phineas and Ferb in their backyard. Suddenly, there's weight on his head and he looks up and sees a teal paw. "Oh, there you are, Perry."

…

Author's note:

I…don't know what to say.

Oh, wait, yes I do. If you are a diehard PhineasxIsabella fan, I don't want any reviews saying that Isabella should be with Phineas. I like FerbxIsabella. _Deal with it. _

Just that I hope you like these.


	5. Drabbles: Perry & Vanessa

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry and Agent M (Molly the Mouse)**

**These drabbles will mainly be about Human!PerryxVanessa, but will contain the couples previously mentioned.**

**Kinda got little spoilers for 'Minor Monogram'.**

**Instructions for the 'back button': move cursor over to the button then click. **

…

**1. Dye (requested by Stinkfly3)-**

Perry waits in the living room of Charlene Doofenshmirtz's home. He twiddles his thumbs patiently. Suddenly, he hears a shriek and bolts out of the room; putting on his fedora. "_Vanessa!_" He shouts in panic. He runs to the bathroom and kicks the door down, then takes up a karate pose. He pauses when he sees the problem.

Vanessa stands in front of the mirror, clutching her hair; which is now a dark grey.

"Vanessa…?" Perry asks.

"Look at it, Perry! The box said my hair would be _black!_"

Perry tilts his head. "You tried to dye your hair?"

"Yeah."

"Well…Why?"

"Because, compare to all the other goths, my hair is just…plain brown."

Perry pauses, then smiles and wanders over to her. He cups her chin in one hand. "I _like _your plain, brown hair." He says gently, earning a smile in return. "Besides, only one of us can have strangely-coloured hair in this relationship, and that position's been taken."

**2. Crash (requested by Leopardlover1002)-**

"I'm sorry, Perry."

Perry didn't respond, looking out into the distance, hands in his pockets. He had a neutral expression on his face.

"Perry, look, it was an accident-"

"You crashed my car." Perry said. It'd been the first thing he'd said in a while.

"I know."

"That was the car the Major gave me. You realize he's like a father to me, so you can imagine how much that hurts."

Vanessa nodded.

"I also hope you realize that you're never borrowing my car to drive again. Mainly because I no longer have one." He sighed through his nose and raised a hand, putting it over his eyes. "When the Major finds out…"

"I'll tell him it was my fault."

"No, no. Even if you tell him that, he'll be peeved that I allowed you to borrow it. Being the daughter to my nemesis and everything." Perry put his hand back into his pocket. He raised his eyebrows. "I'm gonna get grounded. Or, at least, have to do laps around our jogging course."

"You have a jogging course?"

"Don't change the subject."

Vanessa's brow furrowed.

"I hate this."

Vanessa looked up. Perry was looking at her. "I have too many 'good guy' attributes, so I pretty much _have _to forgive you." He held out his arms and Vanessa smiled and hugged him. "But I hope you realize I probably would've forgiven you anyway. Love and all that…"

**3. Play (sort of AU, where Perry was changed in to a human when he was a child and Monogram has made him go to school)-**

Agent P sat in the sandbox, lonely and upset. Monogram had sent him to school - to this _prison. _Children were everywhere, laughing and playing and drawing on the ground with chalk. He didn't even have a proper name. At the agency, he was the new Agent P. Monogram had told the teachers that he was simply 'P'. That was one of Monogram's worst ideas. Seriously, a name. Was that too hard to ask for?

He had tried making friends, but no such luck. They had laughed at his teal hair and his 'name'. It wasn't his fault. He used to be a platypus, that was why his hair was so odd. He'd tried to tell them this, but they had just laughed harder and had shoved him; making him fall to the ground. Agent P looked down at the scrape on his knee and sniffled. Monogram would be disappointed if he knew Agent P had been 'defeated' by little kids, who were barely bigger then Agent P himself.

"You wanna play?"

Agent P looked up. Standing in front of him was a girl with blue eyes and brown hair, wearing a white t-shirt and black dungarees. She was holding out her hand.

Agent P just stared.

"Well? C'mon. You _are _the new kid, right?"

Agent P nodded slowly.

"I'm Vanessa. So, you wanna play?"

Agent P nodded again. He reached out hesitantly and took her hand and was surprised at how strong she was when she pulled him up. "You don't talk much." Vanessa said to him once he was standing, then gave him a toothy smile. "I like you."

Agent P, for the first time that day, smiled.

**4. Meaning-**

"So, what does it _mean, _exactly?"

"What does what mean?"

"Your little platypus noise."

"Oh, that?" Perry asks as they walk down the street together. "Well, it can mean anything."

"But, earlier, you made that noise when my dad kicked you. What did that mean?"

"Well-" He is interrupted when a child accidentally kicks a football into his groin.

Perry pauses, stuck with his knees slightly bent, a pained expression on his face. The brown-haired boy picks up the ball. "Sorry!" He exclaims, then runs off.

Perry stays in the position, before letting out a quiet platypus chatter.

"Oh," Vanessa realizes. "That's what it means."

**5. Snap (Another child AU)-**

Agent P could deal with being mocked for his 'name' or his hair. He could put up with it because he knew that he was better then them. But when they made fun of Vanessa because of the fact her dad is 'insane', _that _was when they had gone too far. Despite the fact that Vanessa had stuck out her tongue at the bullies, Agent P had still gotten involved.

And now he was in a classroom, head down in shame. The teacher had lectured him about fights in the playground and that 'giving people black eyes would not be tolerated' (whatever tolerated meant. Seriously, did they really think he'd understand that?).

"Psst!"

Agent P looked up, over at the window. Vanessa was staring at him through the little gap. "Hey. I saved you a juice box." She slipped the apple juice box through the gap. "Thanks, by the way. You were really brave."

Agent P smiled. "No problem."

**6. Valentine's Day-**

Perry was never sure what to get Vanessa for Valentine's day.

The shops were covered in pink, frilly things, which were a huge X in Vanessa's head.

When he had settled with the idea of getting her a Scraping Fangs CD and bouquet of black roses, he had been pleased with himself. The Scraping Fangs CD was in his back pocket and he had just bought the flowers when Major Monogram called him about Doofenshmirtz. _Ok, _Perry thought, _One quick fight and I'll be outta there…_

He didn't expect to walk through the door, only to have the flowers zapped with a laser, making them set alight. "_Doof!" _Perry exclaimed.

Doofenshmirtz crossed his arms stubbornly. "I don't accept flowers from my _nemesis, _Perry the Platypus, so don't expect me to get you anything."

"They weren't for you, they were for Vanes-"

"Perry!"

Perry paused. "-sa." He almost cringed as Vanessa jogged over.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Perry." Vanessa said. She paused when she saw the flowers. "Um…"

"He did it." Perry quickly said, pointing to Doofenshmirtz. "But, I got you a CD!"

Vanessa smiled as Perry reached into his back pocket and got out the case. "Happy Valentine's Day, Vanessa." He handed her the CD.

Vanessa smiled widely and opened it, only for several pieces of broken disc to fall out. Perry paled. "Oh…I may have crushed it when I was sitting in my hover car…" Perry looked at her nervously, then quickly blew the flame away from the roses and held out the burnt flowers. He chuckled nervously, grinning.

Vanessa couldn't help but chuckle and leaned up, kissing his cheek.

**7. Convincing- **

Perry was ashamed to admit it, but Vanessa's big blue eyes were pretty convincing.

If she wanted to play a game while they were at the carnival or, perhaps, if there was a certain area of the park she wished to visit, out came the puppy dog eyes.

She really didn't need to, though. Perry would've said yes anyway. Maybe she was just too used to Heinz caving in under those the gaze from those eyes.

Either way, the eyes were convincing.

**8. League-**

When people saw Vanessa's boyfriend, they made all kinds of comments.

"What's up with his hair?" was a common one.

"He's _cute_!" came from a few girls.

Another one, not as common as the others, was, "He's _way _out of your league, Vanessa." She'd heard it a few times, mainly from her school chums. Some word it differently. Like, for example, "He's way too good for you, Vanessa. Maybe he and I would be good together." That one made her cringe.

One time, Vanessa and Perry had been out together, getting ice cream, when a pair of girls from her class walked by. They'd stopped to talk, secretly making Vanessa irritated. Perry had just blinked in curiosity as they approached. When one of the teenagers had said, "Wow, Vanessa, he's way too good for you," Perry had frowned and removed the ice cream cone from his face. "Now, girls," The agent had said, "I'm not too good for her. _She's _way too good for _me._" With that, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and they went on their merry way.

**9. Jealousy-**

Perry stood back as he watched Monty Monogram and Vanessa chat. He frowned while doing so. He remembered seeing the looks they gave each other when he was still a platypus. As he watched them laugh, his frown deepened. He walked over and wrapped an arm around Vanessa's shoulders. Monty blinked, almost surprised. "Perry?"

"_Hey, Monty._" Perry said, not even hiding his irritation. To think, he and Monty used to be playmates when they were younger (and he was still a platypus) and now he was flirting with his girlfriend. _Traitor._ "Your dad's calling for you."

"Really? I don't hear anything."

"Oh, he's definitely calling for you." He tapped his ear. "Platypus sense of hearing."

"Oh, uh, ok." Monty still looked unsure but waved a goodbye to Vanessa as he walked away.

Vanessa paused, then looked up at him. "Were you _jealous _of your boss' son?"

"Oh, Heaven's no. Just thought I'd let him know you're no longer single." Perry muttered and Vanessa smiled and kissed his cheek.

**10. Stealing-**

Perry gritted his teeth as he witnessed a newly-human Peter the Panda flirt with Vanessa. Oh, no he di'int! Perry growled and stomped over to them. "You know," He said, getting their attention. Peter looked at him with wide eyes. "I can _barely _tolerate you stealing my nemesis. But trying to steal my girlfriend, I. Will. Not. Tolerate."

Peter stayed silent, but gestured for Perry to bring it on with a wave of his hand. Perry's jaw fell open, then he scowled. "Oh, it is _on!_" He ran forward and pushed Peter to the ground and the two men proceeded to wrestle.

It took Major Monogram, Monty Monogram, Carl and at least ten other agents to pull them apart.

**11. Crazy Love-**

Hero and villain's daughter.

Platypus-turned-human and real human.

Teal hair and brown hair.

Brown eyes and blue eyes.

Teal and black.

Male and female.

'Son' of Major Francis Monogram and daughter of Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz.

Perry and Vanessa.

They had the craziest kind of love. They had forbidden love. Really, a hero and the daughter of his nemesis. That screamed FORBIDDEN. But they just didn't care.

Their love may be crazy, but it was true.

…

Author's note:

_This…This _should've been finished _ages _ago. Recently my urge to write Phineas and Ferb has died down, so that's why I haven't been to this fandom in a while. Sorry 'bout that.

I watched the episode 'Minor Monogram' awhile back. I gotta say, when I first heard Monogram's son was gonna appear, I expected it to be a little kid. I thought this kid was gonna screw something up in the O.W.C.A and potentially ruin Perry's mission. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the episode. But the name made me think 'little kid'. I also watched an advert on Youtube for the upcoming Phineas and Ferb episodes and it shows an episode, 'Sipping with the Enemy' and it's about…Monty and Vanessa _on a date! _"Damn," I muttered to myself, "They're trying to fight against us Ferbnessa and Perrynessa fans…" I raised my arm in the air and whisper-exclaimed, "We will not be fought against!" So, you can imagine, some people may go to the Montynessa (I dunno what it's called…) side, but I can imagine there's going to be an avalanche of Ferbnessa and Perrynessa fics when that episode goes on telly. That Perrynessa will be from me…

I hope you guys enjoyed the requests. I quite happen to like 'Dye'.

The Peter the Panda one comes from an idea I may turn into a one-shot of Human!Peter hitting on Vanessa, which makes Perry very angry. I dunno. I might write it. *Shrugs* What do you guys think?

In an upcoming Baby Perry one-shot (yes, I'm writing another one. Hold your horses, it's still in early stages. So far it's only two pages. 'His First Friend' is twelve, My Hat! is four and Suds, Soap and Semi-Aquatic Mammals is five), I'll write about my way of Monty and Perry meeting. Also, in these drabbles, another pairing will be added: **Brotherly!MontyxHuman!Perry. ***Shrugs* I think they'd be like brothers, what with Perry having a father-son relationship with Monogram after all.

Please send in more requests! I'd love to hear the suggestions you guys have!


	6. Drabbles: Perry & Vanessa & Heinz

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own these versions of Human!Perry and Human!Platyborg. I also own Agent M (Molly the Mouse).**

**These drabbles will mainly be about Frenemy!HeinzxHuman!Perry and Human!PerryxVanessa but will contain other pairings mentioned.**

**You wish to use the back button? Yeah, sure. Why not?**

…

**1. The New Platyborg (Alt Perrynessa. Includes Human/Cyborg [whatever you want to call it] version of Platyborg. Occurs after the movie. Requested by NattyMc)-**

The daughter of the ex-emperor was alarmed when she saw Platyborg.

After doing time in prison (a _lot _of time), her father was now allowed to go home. However, the O.W.C.A - after all the agents came back, some with metallic limbs - decided to keep watch over him; just in case.

Vanessa had gone over to her father's house, just for a visit (her mother had made her). She'd found, however, that her father wasn't home. She wasn't sure where he was, but she decided to wait for him. As she prepared to sit down in a chair, the door was suddenly knocked down. Vanessa had been a mixture of emotions: scared, worried, intrigued. Standing in the doorway, was a human man with an, almost complete, metallic body. Teal hair poked out of the black plating on his head. Vanessa's mouth fell open when she recognized the design. "Platyborg?"

Platyborg gave her a glance. His face showed no emotion - his one eye half-lidded and his mouth set in a straight line. He stared for a second, then looked forward and walked slowly into the room. He looked around. "What're you doing here?" Vanessa asked.

Platyborg looked to his right and tapped a picture of her father. "You're looking for my dad?" She asked and Platyborg gave a tiny nod. "He's not here right now. I dunno where he is."

Platyborg paused then turned and made his way over. He sat down in an empty armchair, obviously intending to wait for Doofenshmirtz. Vanessa didn't think he was trying to keep his eye locked on her, but he _was _staring at her. "What're you really doing here, Platyborg?" Vanessa asked, crossing her arms.

Platyborg reached into some pocket (which he may or may not have, she didn't know) and showed her a badge with O.W.C.A carved into it. "You're working for them again?"

Platyborg nodded. Vanessa frowned. Was he giving her some sort of silent treatment? "Platyborg, why aren't you talking? Platyborg, speak!"

Platyborg stared at her. He opened his mouth and whispered, "S…Sss…Sp…Speak…"

Vanessa stopped and stared at him. His voice was metallic and cold and sounded almost like he was about to cry. Her mouth made an 'o' shape. "You can't speak yet…"

Platyborg tilted his head slightly. Just then, Doofenshmirtz walked through, his toy train under one arm and a frown on his face. "What happened to my door?"

Platyborg stood up. "Oh, it's _you, _Platyborg. Well, you picked a _great _time to be here. I was just out getting my choo-choo fixed. Poor thing's wheel fell off…"

"Dad!" Vanessa exclaimed. "You never said Platyborg came to see you!"

"Yeah, well, he's my nemesis again."

Vanessa crossed her arms. "Thought you said you weren't gonna do anymore evil stuff…"

"Things change, hun." He frowned at Platyborg. "Well, as ya can see, Platyborg, nothing's going on. Everything's totally _non-evil._ So, you can rush off to Major Monogram and tell him that, ok?"

Platyborg stared then slowly walked toward where the door used to be. He stepped over the broken wood.

"Platyborg!"

Platyborg turned. Vanessa pushed passed her father. "Vanessa?" Doofenshmirtz asked in confusion.

Vanessa approached the cyborg. "Here," She held out a yellow object.

Platyborg took it and stared. A dictionary. "Just to help you in lessons." Vanessa smiled and winked.

Platyborg tilted his head then turned away and flew off, his wings opening up on his back. He shot off into the sky, leaving a hole in a small cloud as he shot through it. Vanessa smiled as she watched and was almost surprised to find herself blushing.

**2. Aim…and Miss (Requested by NattyMc)-**

Perry had been surprised when Monogram had told him the Regurgitator had escaped from prison. He wasn't surprised when he was assigned to go and stop him from his latest scheme: get revenge on Heinz Doofenshmirtz. The Regurgitator had, apparently, already done his part by kidnapping Heinz (which Perry discovered as he arrived in Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc.). Vanessa had just picked a really bad day to visit her father.

Perry had gotten to the Regurgitator's lair quicker then before and saw Heinz and Vanessa in a round room, almost cowering in fear in front of the Regurgitator. Heinz looked as though he was trying to protect Vanessa, standing in front of her. He announced his arrival in quite a suave manner, if he said so himself. The Regurgitator had asked the duo if they had any last words and, from the shadows, a voice sounded, "Yes. I have a few words to say, actually."

Vanessa had immediately smiled as Perry lifted his fedora from his eyes and stepped into the light. "Perry!"

"Who are you?" The Regurgitator demanded, obviously not recognizing his old nemesis (if he could be called that. It'd been for one day!).

Perry held out his badge. "I'm Agent P of the O.W.C.A. I believe you have my girlfriend."

"Oh, sure!" Heinz exclaimed. "Just forget that _I'm here _too, Perry the Platypus!"

"Sh, Heinz." Perry said, putting an index finger to his lips.

"Oh, you are _so _not dating my daughter anymore…"

"_Dad._" Vanessa said.

It had been villain vs. agent. Perry looked as though he was winning, despite a few wounds here and there from wacky inventions the Regurgitator had thrown at him (a couple of times, quite literally). It was when the Regurgitator pointed a ray gun at Doofenshmirtz did Perry panic. "Say goodbye, Heinz Doofenshmirtz!" The Regurgitator had threatened.

"Wait! Can't we talk about this?" Heinz pleaded.

Perry had gotten up from his place on the floor and ran, just as the Regurgitator pulled the trigger. Everything seemed to go in slow motion. Perry running toward Heinz, Vanessa shouting for them both, Doofenshmirtz's expression changing to one of surprise as Perry pushed him out of the way, Perry turning his head to look at the blast of green that was approaching him; reflected in his eyes. Then a flash as Perry stayed there, laying in midair. The blast had hit him and Perry was thrashing about, the blast electrocuting him. Vanessa shouted his name, Doofenshmirtz gasped and the Regurgitator laughed in triumph as the blast lost power and faded away and Perry crumpled to the floor. Doofenshmirtz pushed himself forward and touched Perry's shoulder. "P-Perry? Perry the P-Platypus?"

Perry lay on the floor, curled up slightly; smoke trailing up from the burns on his blazer. "_Perry!" _Vanessa shouted, running toward him. She fell to her knees and turned the agent over then lifted Perry's head onto her lap. Perry's eyes were shut. Vanessa felt the tears in her eyes.

Doofenshmirtz stared at the scene. His daughter hugging his nemesis, crying into his neck as the agent's body was cradled in her arms. He'd saved him. Perry had had a choice and he picked to save him. Doofenshmirtz turned to look at the Regurgitator with the most deadliest glare he'd ever had.

…

Monogram had been at his desk, working (aka, secretly doodling), when two members of the Doofenshmirtz family crashed into the room. He was about to demand what they were doing there when he saw what Heinz, who was now kneeling on the floor, was holding. Perry. "Please," Heinz said. "Ya gotta help him."

The pen dropped from Monogram's hand and he rushed forward. He took Perry from Heinz and asked how this had happened. Vanessa had hysterically explained everything and Monogram picked Perry up and ran down the corridor, asking them why they hadn't taken him to the hospital. Heinz had just exclaimed that they had panicked.

A few hours later, Perry was in a hospital bed, oxygen mask strapped to his face. Bandages were wrapped around his torso. The trio were not allowed to visit him - not yet. However, next morning, Vanessa, Heinz and Monogram went back to the hospital. As soon as the nurse said Perry was awake, Vanessa had been the first one to ask to go in. All three had entered the room and, immediately, Perry smiled. "Hello,"

Vanessa rushed forward, hugging Perry around the neck. As soon as she pulled back, she exclaimed, "What were you thinking, Perry! You could've _died!_"

Perry hesitated. "I was saving your father…"

Monogram approached the bed. "Agent P," He said sternly. Perry looked at him. "You're grounded. _And _you have to do ten laps around the jogging course."

Perry's expression turned to one of disappointment. Heinz awkwardly approached Perry's side. "Hey, uh, Perry the Platypus…uh…I kinda wanted to say…thanks for, ya know…saving my life an' all…"

Perry frowned. "Just don't let it happen again, Heinz."

After the awkwardness was over and the two men left Perry's room, Perry looked to Vanessa. "I really am sorry, Vanessa."

Vanessa sighed through her nose and crossed her arms. "I know you were just being the good guy and saving my dad, Perry, but…Gosh, Perry, don't you know how scared I was?"

"You were scared?"

"I thought you were _dead!_ I can deal with the fact that you're a secret agent and everything, but risking your life like that?" She turned away from him. "How can I deal with all of that, Perry?"

Perry frowned, then reached out and took her hand. "Perhaps…we can deal with it together."

Vanessa looked at him and Perry smiled at her gently. Vanessa slowly smiled back at him and she stepped closer, placing her head on his shoulder and he nuzzled her head with his.

Outside the window, Doofenshmirtz and Monogram were frowning, their arms crossed. "Oh, he is _so _not dating my daughter anymore," said Doofenshmirtz.

At the same time, Monogram uttered, "Oh, she is _so _not dating my agent anymore."

**3. The Wrong Target (Requested by NattyMc.)-**

The day had _started _normal for Vanessa.

The weirdness had begun when she visited her father and heard him shouting at Perry from the other side of the door. Not exactly angrily, just…in a 'nemesis' sort of way. She opened the door angrily, about to tell her father to shush, when Doofenshmirtz suddenly shouted, "No! Vanessa!"

She suddenly saw flashes of green and felt herself change. When she finally opened her eyes, she looked up at Perry. _Up at Perry? _Was she laying on the floor? No. She could feel her feet on the floor. So…she looked at her hand…which was teal. Teal? _Teal! _"W-What happened to me!"

"Vanessa?" Perry asked, blinking his eyes. He picked her up, stared at her, then glared at Doofenshmirtz. "You tried to change me back into a platypus!"

"Well, duh." Doofenshmirtz crossed his arms. "Then you won't be dating my daughter anymore."

"Dad!" Vanessa exclaimed. "Because of you, I'm a platypus! A _platypus, _Dad!"

"Hey," Perry frowned. "What's wrong with being a platypus?"

"Well, nothing," Vanessa said. "But…it feels so weird!"

"Don't worry," Perry said. "You'll start sweating milk soon."

"I'll…What?!" Vanessa asked.

Perry cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Maybe I shouldn't have said that…"

**4. Birthday-**

It was difficult to buy something for a teenage girl, Doofenshmirtz discovered.

Pink, frilly things would only make her angry. He didn't particularly want to go into one of those scary, goth stores to buy something for her. Doofenshmirtz thought over what Vanessa liked. Those scary, heavy metal bands? Oh, no. He wouldn't buy her another CD. Not after the last one gave him an almighty headache. Popularity? Well, he couldn't exactly buy her that. Her parents? Well, he was her father and no way was he going to the store to give himself back. So what else…?

Doofenshmirtz's head snapped up and his eyes widened. Of course!

One week later, on the day of Vanessa's birthday, Heinz showed her the large present in his apartment. It was wrapped in orange wrapping paper with a green bow. Vanessa smiled widely.

"See, Vanessa?" Heinz said excitedly. "I got you something you've always loved, something you've wanted for a long time -"

"A car?" Vanessa asked.

"Better!" Heinz pressed a button on a remote and the box fell.

Vanessa's smile faded.

Perry sat, knees to his chest and hands behind his back, wrapped up in rope with a piece of tape over his mouth. He struggled against the rope.

"Behold! Perry the Platypus!"

"Dad!" Vanessa exclaimed. "You got me my _boyfriend _for my _birthday?_"

Perry's speech was muffled against the tape. Vanessa walked over and ripped it from his mouth. Perry let a pained expression overcome his face. "Ow!" Perry frowned at Doofenshmirtz. "I know you're desperate to get her a present but really, Doof? Really?"

"Well," Doofenshmirtz put his hands on his hips. "It's not like you can get her anything better!"

**5. Tears-**

Perry knew Heinz was serious when he warned the agent that if he made Vanessa cry, then Heinz would make him cry.

Perry understood that fathers were protective of their children, whatever the gender. He knew that, sometimes, Monogram was worried about Perry dating Vanessa. After all, Vanessa was Heinz's daughter. He had every right to worry. But, really, no one had to worry about his relationship. Perry would never make her cry. He'd rather jump off a building - _without _a parachute or any thing else to catch his fall.

**6. Family-**

Doofenshmirtz had always thought of Perry as family.

Ok, sure, when the teenager (or platypus. Whatever form) was kicking his backside, he tended to feel angry. Who wouldn't? Try all morning to make a machine to take over the Tri-State area and what does some teal-haired kid do? Destroy it. Turn it into dust then just tip his hat and fly out the window on his hovercraft!

When he found out the agent was dating his daughter, he had been shocked. Surprised. Angry. But ever since then, Perry had been more of a son to him. Whether Vanessa and Perry had wedding rings or not, whether or not they _were _married (which they weren't but, hey, the future had many secrets), the agent was as much as his son as he was Monogram's.

It only took Perry turning into a human and dating his daughter for Heinz to realize that.

…

**Author's note:**

**Yeah, only six drabbles this time. Sorry.**

**This would've been up sooner, but I was in Spain for three weeks.**

**I hope you enjoyed the drabbles, NattyMc. Although the first two kinda turned into _novels _then drabbles…Oh, well.**

**I kinda like to think that, even though the evil is gone and he's human, Platyborg would have trouble speaking and would sound kinda metallic and cold. I also imagine he doesn't smile much, but, hey, that's just me.**


	7. Drabbles: Perry & Stacy & Candace

**All the Small Moments**

**I don't own Phineas and Ferb. Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh do.**

**I do, however, own this version of Human!Perry.**

**These drabbles will focus on Friendship!Stacy/Human!Perry/Candace, but may contain the other pairings previously mentioned.**

**Back buttons come in all shapes and sizes; all colours and designs, but they all have one function. Feel free to use if you want.**

…

**1. Trust -**

It was deep into the summer now, and Candace had still taken to spying on her brothers from the window of her bedroom. She'd sit there for at least an hour or three a day, glaring at them as they worked on another invention she could show to her mother (keyword being '_could'_). Only, as of late, she had another reason to keep a close eye on them.

"Who's that?"

Candace didn't look as Stacy joined her at the window; her blue eyes were completely fixed upon the figure laying beneath their tree, "Perry."

"No, not him. Him." Stacy pointed.

"Yeah. It's Perry."

"He has the same name as your pet platypus?"

"Uh-huh."

"And…he's dressed in a suit like that?" She took another gesture at the teal-haired boy. Admittedly, he didn't look _as _ridiculous since removing his blazer and folding it in his lap, but the beaver tail tie didn't help one bit.

"Yep."

"…Huh." Strange coincidences aside, Stacy gave a smile and leaned forward a bit to see him better, "He's pretty cute."

"Ew!" Candace finally looked to her friend, cringing, "Stacy! That's Phineas and Ferb's weird friend!"

"Well, then he can't be all that bad." Stacy shrugged. She was fully aware of how Candace felt toward the teenager that had suddenly started popping up to hang out with her brothers. It was just too obvious to miss.

"Are you kidding me? Stacy! What kind of teenager decides to spend their summer hanging with a bunch of kids?" Candace turned back to the window, her face twisted into a frown. There was just something not right about this guy. Sure, he was nice (from what she'd seen of him), but something just…wasn't right. Wasn't normal. _Pah. Perfect for my brothers, then…_

"Well, if we're done staring at him like this," Stacy spoke up, turning to go, "I'm gonna go say hi."

"Stacy!" Candace began to object, but Stacy had already left. She huffed and turned back to the window. Trust Stacy to cave so easily…

The redhead's eyes narrowed as she watched Stacy walk out. Perry heard her footsteps before she even said anything and his chocolate eyes flew open, like he was expecting danger. Candace scoffed as he got to his feet, handing his blazer to Phineas, who exclaimed, "Hey, Stacy! This is Perry; he's our friend! Perry, this is Stacy. She's Candace's best friend."

Candace's frown deepened as Perry politely held out a hand, which Stacy immediately took hold of and shook. Perry offered her a spot under the tree the boys had been relaxing under, which she took another a mere moment of consideration. Candace growled. Alright, so Perry was a pretty nice guy, she could admit, but that didn't mean he was accepted.

He might've won Stacy over with a smile and a quick introduction, but not her. He'd have to fight for her trust - and that was not an easy battle.

**2. Cold - **

Perry ventured up the stairs in search of the bathroom. Linda had been polite enough to let him use it after a dinner of Mexican food. She'd given him directions, but he didn't need them. As a platypus, he hadn't gone into the bathroom all that often (what with not needing to use it and all); only when he needed to go to his lair. Even still, he had this house memorised completely.

Patting his stomach and blowing out some air, he walked towards the door. It wasn't like that food hadn't been tasty - it'd been delicious! - but, boy, could he not handle spices. Perry approached the door, only to hear the tap of the bathroom sink turn on. He immediately paused. Candace had left the dinner table much earlier, slinking off in a sulk after having collected some food. She'd made it obvious why she didn't want to eat with them too. Linda had rubbed Perry's shoulder and assured him that Candace just wasn't good with guests or strangers, but Perry knew better. It was simply him she didn't like. Perry had never had any gripe or beef with Candace. She was pushy at worst, but she'd never bothered him too much. Truthfully, he'd expected some sort of retaliation at his presence.

The door finally opened and Candace began to step out, paused, then frowned when she saw him. He offered a smile, "Hello, Candace."

Candace's frown never lifted, "Hey yourself." She grumbled, brushing passed him.

Well, that was a start.

"Uh - did you like dinner?"

A shrug.

"…Oh! Your mom said that there's some ice cream in the freezer, so if you want dessert -"

"I don't trust you."

The comment was so sudden it made Perry pause, his smile dropping. Candace glared from where she stood in the doorway of her bedroom, making him know she didn't like him in the house. Memories of when he first arrived in this home came swirling back; she hadn't been too fond of getting a platypus and not a puppy or a kitten. Perry didn't know what to say, and all that came out was "…Oh."

It was unclear whether she was just sick of him or whether she was unsatisfied with the lack of proper response. Either way, she turned and slammed the door behind her. Perry's brow furrowed. Really, he had nothing against Candace - he understood why she found him weird. Still, it just kinda hurt that one of his old owners was acting so coldly toward him.

**3. Umbrella -**

Candace had never felt so lost and alone and cold. It wasn't just because she was literally two out of three of those things right now. The rain seemed to only pour on her, she swore; kissing her cheeks and bare arms coldly as it did so. Her chest felt hollow and her limbs felt rather numb. One would say she was making a big deal out of nothing, that she was just being silly, that her teenage hormones were getting to her, but she thought otherwise. Everything felt like it was going wrong and she had no idea what to do.

Linda and the boys obviously hadn't noticed she'd returned early from her date. She hadn't stepped foot in the house yet; simply sat down on the steps to their home to let out her sorrows and let her tears blend with the rain.

There had to be some explanation. There just had to be. Candace sniffled and wiped a stray tear from her cheek, finally noticing that the rain had stopped. So, then…why could she still hear it?

"Candace?"

Candace glanced to her left, not bothering to lift her head from her arms just yet, and saw twin black shoes and teal trousers. Candace didn't reply to him. He didn't wait for one. "What're you doing out here?"

This time, there was a wait, though Candace didn't exactly feel like speaking of it. Since when was it his business? Stubbornly, she kept silent, though this was quickly thwarted by the little gasp she let out when he wrapped his blazer around her shoulders to warm her up. "You'll catch your death out here, you know…You should come inside."

She'd always known Perry to be a nice guy and she'd always known he was friendly and cared about her brothers and everything, but - after the way she'd treated him - she'd expected him to hate her. She still didn't raise her head to him, but there was something about the way he was speaking to her now, how soft his voice was, and the way he was waiting for her permission to move that made her want to speak of everything.

And that she did.

"…Jeremy didn't show up, Perry…"

"Didn't show up? Whe -…Oh." Perry's brow furrowed. No wonder the poor girl was broken up. He knew how seriously she handled her relationship with Jeremy and she jumped to conclusions. He gestured to the step she was sat on and she shuffled over to let him sit. He made sure to keep his umbrella over her, even if it meant getting himself wet. "…Oh. That's…I'm sorry, Candace."

"I waited for a whole _hour…_"

"…I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation. Maybe…caught in traffic? Or…no phone connection? Couldn't call or text? Battery died?" Candace only gave a sigh in response, which made Perry's brow furrow. He looked away in thought, then gently held out his free hand, "C'mon, Candace. Let's go inside, then you can tell your mom all about it, if you want. If you don't, that's fine. Either way, I won't leave you while you feel like this."

Candace finally raised her head to look at him. Had she really been so cold to this sweet gentleman before? "…Okay." She took his hand, wiping her eye with the other, and offered him a little smile. Perry smiled, then gently helped her up and led her to the front door.

**4. Television -**

Perry threw his head back and laughed loudly as Candace mocked another person on the TV. Work all done for the day; it was time to kick back and relax. He'd intended to spend time with Phineas and Ferb, but Linda had told him they'd gone to Baljeet's house to help him with a summer school project or something. He'd been inclined to wait for them and had even assisted Linda around the house for a bit before she told him she could handle the rest of the chores. Thus, he'd sat down on the sofa, knowing the boys could be home any minute, only for Candace to walk in minutes later. It seemed she'd warmed up to him considerably since he'd helped her that one evening, and now the two slouched on the sofa together. Candace was introducing him to a game she and Stacy played, where they would swap between random channels and mock whoever was on the screen. Perry thought it was a little mean at first, though Candace's jokes were too funny to _not _laugh at.

It was when Candace had reached the tenth channel available to the Flynn-Fletcher family that Perry wiped a tear from his eye and muttered, shaking his head, "I've never done this before…"

"You _did _seem pretty surprised when I talked about the game to you."

"Oh, no. I meant watching TV for this long."

Candace paused, then looked at him, "…Really? You've seriously never done this?"

"No. I don't watch TV all that often. Except Tuesdays. Tuesdays are when my soaps are on." The silence that followed made him look at her, "…Is that weird?"

"Uh…" Candace didn't respond to that question, "So…what do you do all day, then? I mean, you're not here _all _the time."

"Work, mostly."

"You have a job? Where do you work?"

"Uh…" Oh. What would he say? "…Um…Mr. Slushy Dawg…"

"Really?!" Her excitement was obvious; she was going to use him to speak to Jeremy.

"Uh - yeah."

"I've never seen you there before."

"…Different shifts. Employees moving around - y'know."

"Oh…" Candace looked back to the TV and Perry hoped that that would be the end of that, then she whipped around and asked, "Do you ever work with Jeremy? Does he ever talk about me? What does he say? Good things or bad things? Did he notice I'm wearing a new white skirt?"

"…..Yes to all of those."

Candace seemed satisfied with that - despite it not making a whole lot of sense - and turned away, squeezing her hands together in glee. Perry could practically see the cartoon hearts flying around her head. There was silence again as Candace tried to think of another joke she could use to make Perry laugh, then another thought occurred. Jeremy didn't work _that _much, certainly not the amount of time that Perry had implied. The redhead turned back to question him on this, resulting in another hasty lie from the teal-haired man, "…I work two jobs."

"Really? Where else?"

"Uh…" _Think! Think! Think! _"I'm…an intern. At a…police station…"

"Really?"

"…Uh-huh. My dad works there, so I'm kinda in trouble if I don't go." _Not a complete lie._

"He forces you to work there?" Candace raised her brow. That didn't seem fair at all!

"Uh…no, not really. I mean, I needed money, he offered. You know."

"Oh. But don't you ever get breaks?"

"Not usually."

Candace frowned. What kind of dad didn't allow his son a break from time to time? That was just…mean. And if Perry had never just sat down and watched TV (except on Tuesdays), then what other teenager things had he also never experienced? Had he ever been to the mall just to purchase clothes and maybe a hot dog? Had he ever texted someone all night so he was tired next morning? Had he ever listened to all the recent pop songs and downloaded all of them, despite not liking them, just so he had something to talk about with his friends? Ever been swimming with friends? Ever had a road trip? Ever been forced to go on a camping vacation by his parents? What else cut into his TV time?

"Candace? Are you going to say more funny things about the TV?"

Candace barely heard him; she was already pressing buttons on her phone. "Stacy," Candace said once she picked up, "get your purse. We're going to the mall."

**5. Translator -**

"Okay," Candace's fingers flew across the keypad of her phone, then immediately thrust the phone into Perry's face once she reached the right text, "what does he mean by THIS?!"

Perry blinked as he tried to get use to the phone's light shining, then squinted at the text.

_Candace TTYL :) _

"…Pretty sure that just means he'll talk to you later, Candace…"

"But what does it MEAN?!" Candace exclaimed, throwing her arms up dramatically. "How MUCH later?! What does he mean by TALK?! Like, is it the kind of talk like 'hey, let's talk' or is it 'we need to _talk'_?! And how?! Is he gonna call me? Text me? Is he gonna come here or does he want me to go over there?!"

"…I don't think it matters, Candace…"

"Don't say that!"

Perry blinked, his brow furrowing. Stacy sat beside him on Candace's bed, sucking loudly on the straw of her soda drink. The teal-haired man didn't know what Candace wanted him to say about Jeremy's texts. She had said that he could translate them, being a guy and all, but he seemed to be failing to satisfy her thus far.

"Okay, look," Candace flipped through her phone until she found another text, then shoved this one in his face, "what about this one?!"

"…They're…they're just hugs and kisses, right…?"

"But what KIND of hugs and kisses?!"

"W-What _kind…?_"

"Yeah! And - hold on…" She brought up another, "What does this mean?! I asked if he wanted to go to the café down the street and this is what he sent back!"

"…It just says 'cool'…"

"Precisely!"

Perry glanced at Stacy, who caught his eye and just shrugged. Perry looked back to Candace, "Um…that's…just what he means. That's…what guys do. They say what they mean."

"Pfft! Come on, Perry! It's like you don't know guys at all!"

Perry went thoroughly blank then. Speechless, he turned to look at Stacy, who reached out and sympathetically patted his shoulder.

**6. Voice -**

It was soon after Candace decided to try a little harder to like Perry that Linda suggested introducing him to some of the things she liked. "He's gonna be here a lot, Candace," she'd told her, "you might as well try and get along better." Ever since Perry had helped her with that Jeremy problem, she'd intended to be a bit nicer to him. What better way than, she didn't know, showing him her interests? And how hard could that be - they were both teenagers, after all! Everybody knew teenagers all liked the same things!

"Have you ever heard of this band?" She picked up her next CD and showed it to him. Perry took it from her and stared at the people on the cover. When she'd asked him what music he listened to, he'd awkwardly replied that he didn't listen to music. Candace had considered giving up then, but figured - hey, why not get him interested in bands?

"…I think so." Perry said uncertainly.

Candace collected her iPod from her bedside table, scrolled through it, then offered Perry the headphones. He plugged them into his ears and waited as she selected the song she and Stacy had had the honour of performing with The Bettys. Perry gave a little jump when the music started (she turned down the volume), then waited until Crash had begun to sing. When she got to the chorus, Perry began bobbing his head slightly and smiling. Candace felt a little relieved and waited until the song was over, "So? What did you think?"

"That was good. I like them."

Alright. The Bettys. Check.

"Okay…" She scrolled through more songs, passing him another CD, "These guys?"

"…No. I don't think so…"

"Alright. Here, listen to this."

He did so, and everything he thought about the song was told through his cringing and wincing. Candace at least let him listen to the whole song before questioning his opinion. A prompt shake of his head told her the Paisley Sideburn Brothers' music was not appreciated.

Candace scrolled through more songs, "You know Love Händel, right?"

"Of course. Everyone knows them." She was about to go to a different song when he chirped, "I like Music Makes Us Better."

The redhead let him listen to that while she picked out another CD of hers. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Perry bobbing his head and doing a little dance. Candace gave an amused little smile at seeing it, then she plucked another CD from her shelf and took her place next to him on her bed. She waited until that song was over, then she found the next song for him to try, "Here, listen to this one. I sang this one with them too."

"Okay…" Perry waited until the song started. He seemed confused on some points of it, but still he bobbed his head to the rhythm. "Strange topic for a song…but I like it."

Tiny Cowboys. Check.

Candace started to flip to another song when her phone rang. She checked the caller ID, then handed Perry the iPod, "Hang on, Perry, it's Stacy."

"Okay." Perry replied as she got up to take the call. The monotreme-turned-man sorted through Candace's CDs for some idea of who to listen to next. Most of them seemed to be the other albums of the bands he'd listened to already, though there was one at the back that didn't have a cover. Curious, he picked it up and read it. All that was on the plain case was _w/ Mom._

Perry raised a brow, then searched through Candace's iPod for such a thing. There was no song called _w/ Mom, _though there was a song with 'Me' listed as the artist. Got to be linked, right? Perry selected that certain song, alarmed to hear jazz in his ears seconds later.

When Candace returned from her talk with Stacy, she looked to Perry and went to apologise for the wait, then froze as she heard him, "Wow, Candace! I didn't know you could sing like this!"

"Don't listen to that!" She exclaimed, yanking the headphones away before he could hear more of her allergy-affected voice.

**7. Haircut -**

Stacy had always thought Perry to be kinda - maybe a little - cute. He wasn't usually the type of guy she liked, but there was something about him that made him a little cute. Maybe his suit. Or his physique. Or, hey, maybe it was his teal-coloured hair. She wasn't exactly used to seeing odd hair colours, but she'd had her own experience, what with Ferb's green hair and everything. Maybe it wasn't even that. Maybe it was his eyes…which she couldn't exactly see.

Stacy stared at Perry out of the corner of her eye. As he sat there and listened to Candace, he continuously brushed and blew his hair out of his eyes. It _was _getting a bit long, she noted. Reached just passed the base of his neck now. You could tie it in a ponytail! Did he not have a hairdresser or a barbers to go to or anything? "Hey, uh, Perry?" Stacy spoke up, cutting off Candace's rant. Perry looked to her, moving one bang out of the way as he did. "I know it's not any of my business, but don't you think it's time you cut your hair?"

Candace looked to Perry for a look too. Huh. She can't say she'd ever noticed. "My dad said he could take me to his barber." Perry replied.

Out of nowhere, a bizarre idea came to Candace's mind - and, of course, she had to tell, "We could do it for you!"

Perry whipped around to her so quickly his hair swished, and Stacy raised a brow, "We…can?"

"Sure! It's just hair! How hard can it be?"

"Uh…" Perry looked nervous as Candace grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the chair by her mirror. She pushed him down, making his hair cover his eyes briefly before he pushed it away, "Candace, I-I'm really thankful you want to do this, but…I mean, my dad said he could get me to a professional, so…"

"Oh, c'mon, Perry," Candace placed her hands on her hips as Stacy stood up, "don't you trust us?"

"Well, yes, but -"

"C'mon, it'll be fun!" Candace seemed pretty confident, but she wasn't the one about to be experiment on. Perry's brow furrowed worriedly as Candace grabbed scissors from her bedside table. As Stacy approached, she shoved the scissors into her hands.

"Wha - Why do I have to do it?" Stacy exclaimed, attempting to hand back the scissors.

"Come on, Stace, you know what happened last time I tried to cut hair, right?"

Stacy tried to argue, then simply sighed. Perry looked over his shoulder at her, then turned back to Candace, "Uh - Candace, I'm not sure about this."

"Oh, don't worry, Perry. I'll supervise. Now, close your eyes." She waved her hands at him until he shut them. A few seconds, then he opened one eye. "Hey! No peeking!"

"Sorry." He shut it again.

Stacy gave another sigh as she approached his back, "…Sorry about everything I'm about to do, Perry."

"It's alright. I'll just wear a beanie for the rest of the summer."

He didn't know how long was spent cutting his hair or how it looked; he'd chosen to block out the sounds of snipping in favour of coming up with ways to hide the no doubt bad haircut from Carl and Doofenshmirtz and Vanessa and anyone else whose opinions mattered to him. His grip on the chair's arms was tight. "Just finishing up, Perry." Candace said, in a somewhat sing-song voice. Was it really that bad?

Perry gulped, "Okay."

Finally, he was instructed to open his eyes. When he did, he didn't feel as taken aback or freaked out as he thought he would. Rather, he paused and stared at himself. It…actually wasn't bad. Not bad at all! He leaned forward to observe himself. His hair was still a little scruffy in the way most teenage boys' hair was, but now it framed his features better and made it seem less out of control than normal. His bangs had been sliced so much they barely made it to his cheeks and the hair at the back didn't even reach his neck. He still had those three little strands that stuck up awkwardly on top of his head, but there was nothing Stacy could do about those.

"Well?" Candace said smugly, like she'd predicted his reaction the whole time. "What d'ya think?"

"I…" Perry ran a hand through his hair, tilting his head at all angles to view it properly, "…It's great…!"

"See?!" Candace chirped, "Told you!"

"You really like it?" Stacy asked, worried that maybe he was saying that to make them feel better.

"Yes! It's great! Perfect, even!" Perry felt the back of his head, "You're great at this, Stacy! You should be a hairdresser or something!"

"Hey, what about me?" Candace asked, mostly in mock-offence, "I supervised!"

"You did! And you did great!" Perry exclaimed. Whether he knew she was only teasing or not was debatable. He stood up from the chair, leaned closer to the mirror for one last look, then turned and suddenly hugged them both, "Thank you, girls!"

His two friends regarded his hug somewhat awkwardly at first, then each wrapped an arm around him, "No problem." Candace replied.

As they broke apart, Stacy looked down at the floor, where small piles of teal hair was scattered, "Uh…what do we do about this…?"

"Don't worry, I'll clean it." Perry insisted, moving toward the door to grab the vacuum. As he did so, Phineas and Ferb passed by the door, the triangle-headed boy jabbering on about the day's next event. He paused upon seeing Perry, then smiled brightly.

"Wow, nice new 'do, Perry!" Phineas complimented, seconded by the thumbs-up his brother gave.

"Thanks, boys!" Perry chirped back, "Stacy and Candace did it for me!"

"Cool!" Phineas poked his head into the room, "Nice work, girls!"

"Thanks." Stacy smiled at him. "Guess I'd make a good hairdresser, huh?" She asked to her best friend.

"Sure! Hey, we could do that together! It'd be great!"

"You should." Perry said as he came back in with the vacuum, "You're a genius, Stacy."

"Thanks! Hey, could you call my mom and tell her that?"

…

**Author's note:**

**Woah. Woah, woah, woah. I haven't written about Phineas and Ferb in **_**years. **_**My gosh. Has it really been that long? Apparently.**

**Anyway, I'd like to apologise for such a long absence from these fics and this fandom as a whole. I got into other fandoms and, honestly, haven't been watching P+F as much as I should. I'm still not caught up with the new episodes, so if I'm wrong about some info that was mentioned in the ones I haven't seen, that'd be why (and that doesn't include Act Your Age, which I know all about, so that isn't counted). So…yeah. Honestly, I didn't realise it'd been so long! Geez…**

**To anyone (if there is anyone) who's still reading this, I'd like to say I'm officially back in the fandom and ready to write more Human!Perry stuff. I've made a few changes to him while I was away, actually. Nothing major; just a few things here and there. I'm also a little rusty on this, but I'll get it back, no worries. **

**These drabbles will be worked on again and I also have a full-fledge story I'm working on that you guys might enjoy. That won't be for awhile, though, I'm afraid, cause I have exams coming up in the next few months, but I'll do what I can. To anyone whose missing the Human!PerryxVanessa stuffs - got a cute drabble coming up in the next set, as well as a couple of good Perry & Monogram ones.**

**Anyways, I'm officially back into the fandom so…hey! Request some stuff! It'll be great, trust me! I won't ditch you guys again! Hope you've all been well since we last saw each other!**

**Enough rambling. Hope you enjoyed these drabbles - more to come!**

**- The writer who is very sorry and still loves you all.**


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